I've been absent from here lately because things have been busy in the adoption arena. But today, we're insanely excited to announce that late last week we were matched and chosen by a birth mother who is due mid to end of July. She'll be having a little boy, so we'll finally have our Titus. Our Titus will finally be home.

I feel like I need to devote an entire post to the emotions in all of this, but I wanted to get the story down first. I always process and vocalize emotions better after time. So, for now (because it's already after midnight), here is how this beautiful story played out. The pictures included below are just a few from our adoption profile.

The Sunday before last, I attended our church home group, like we always do. I chatted with the other women sharing a brief adoption summary and how my plans involved us having a baby home by August. I added that I knew my own plans were a silly thing to possess and that this adoption has been a constant reminder that we are not in control. Boy, has that been evermore true the past week. 

After getting Gunner to bed that Sunday night, I logged into Instagram to see that several people had tagged me in a post about an agency looking for a home study ready family, desiring to adopt an African-American baby boy due THAT WEEK. I emailed the agency and then emailed our consultancy agency, because I figured it couldn't hurt. We decided the next morning that we would work to present on that case that afternoon.

A long twenty-four hours short, when we woke up on Tuesday we found out that the birth mother didn't chose us. But oh how the Lord was working in those hours. We'd spent those hours rushing to gather finances (we'd needed another $24k + the money we already have in savings for that case) and finalizing a rough draft version of our profile. Amazingly enough we found a way through no interest loans from people in our church and moving of money to pay the extra $24,000. And the adoption profile that was slated to take a month to complete? One incredible woman rushed and had it finished in less than eight hours. I will forever be grateful for the people that rose to the occasion that day. Those that stood beside us and declared that that baby mattered and they'd do everything in their power to help us bring him home. The Lord used that case, that baby that we weren't chosen for to create major leaps in our progress. Upon the completion of our profile that day, we were roughly a month ahead in our timeline. 

On Tuesday afternoon, we presented to another case. And on Wednesday we heard that that mother had chosen us. When I joked that Sunday that the Lord worked in a different time frame than the one I had in mind, I was thinking a slower one. I pictured waiting and waiting. Maybe not even bringing a baby home until after Pacey was born. Not because that's what I wanted, but because our process has been so much waiting that it's just what I expected. But again, He surprises me. 

The current plan is to travel to Utah for the birth and to meet our son around the 20th of July.

This evening we'll have our first phone call with our birth mom. I could write an entire post about how the Lord has changed my heart in regards to domestic adoption and birth mom relationships; but I will say this -- my heart bursts at the seams over the type of love and selflessness she has displayed by choosing this avenue for her son, our son. We can never repay her. We'd so appreciate your prayers for our phone call. Prayers that we'd all be full of grace and know, the supernatural, unexplainable, God breathed kind. This is a new situation for all of us but we believe that He is in the new and the old, the celebratory and the difficult. 

And this season for us? Well, it's an ironic mix of love and despair, celebratory and difficult; because there's nothing easy about adoption or the broken world we live in. But thankfully He has done and continues to do things in His plans, His timeline, because it's proving to be far better than my own.