What Does It Say About Me?

I've seen a lot of critical words lately in blogland and honestly I've done my best to stay far far away from it. It's not my thing and it's not business, so I keep my nose out of it.

So why am I writing about it now? Because I've done the same thing. I've judged before I knew. I've criticized when I felt like I was better. I'm not proud of that, but I am honest about it. And if I'm being even more honest, I've been finding myself doing it a lot lately.

I'm not going to pretend like I know or understand all of the nuances behind the arguments or disagreements I've seen, because I don't. But I do know what the Lord has consistently shown me and taught me through the times in my life that I find myself judging or gossiping.

The number one thing, the number one question I find myself hearing and asking when I place myself higher, think that I'm better, or talk before I know is -- But what about you? YOUR reaction. YOUR judgements. What does it say about YOU? 

God has a funny way of teaching me what's wrong in me when I'm so quick to point out what is wrong in others. I think as women, as human beings it is so easy to point out the speck in someone else's eye when we have a plank in our own. The Bible warns us about this. I have no super quick fix. I don't know how to take the yuck out of my heart in any other way than filling it with the lessons He has taught me and the goodness that fills the Bible. 

Proverbs 11:2 tells us that disgrace follows soon after pride, but wisdom follows soon after humility. And Philippians 2:3 says that we should do NOTHING out of selfish ambition or vain conceit; instead, we should humbly value others before ourselves. As God's chosen people, Colossians 3:12 gives a clear order to clothe ourselves in compassion (not judgement), kindness (not mean spirited words), and humility (not pride).

I am in absolutely no way saying that I'm perfect or even mediocre at doing these things, but I'm trying because I know what my judgement, my gossip, my pride says about ME, and I'm not okay with that. I want to be a beacon of hope, a beacon of kindness, a beacon of love in this world, and not the person who points out speck in everyone they see. 

Lord, let me be that light. Lord, remove the plank in my eye so I can clearly see.
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