Today, as the last day of 2012 passes and we head into another new year, I wanted to take a minute to reflect on this year as I'm sure many other bloggers will do. I'd like to share a little bit about who I've become, what I've learned, and my theme for the next year.
To say that 2012 has been a life changing year is an understatement.
I became a mother, and knowing what I know now, I can't think of many things in my life that changed me more than becoming a mother has. It is the most humbling, gut wrenching, self defying change I have ever had to make and it in all ways has made me better. If I'm being honest, I was a little nervous about becoming a mother. You meet those people who you just know will be great mothers, great parents and I wasn't sure I was one of those. I'm sarcastic, impatient, and sometimes I curse...sorry, Mom. But today, I can stand here and tell you that God made me to be a mother, no doubt in my mind.
In 2012 I learned when to be quiet and when to speak...or write, in regards to this space. I learned that sometimes no response is better than a hasty, evil spirited quip...unfortunately, I haven't always lived by that. And today I can tell you that sometimes your opinion and how you feel should be kept to yourself. I know that not everyone will agree with that statement. In fact, there's a popular Dr. Seuss quote that disputes what I just said -- "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind." As much as I believe in being who you are, I don't think it's always appropriate to say exactly what you feel; because even those who matter, still mind when those words are hurtful. I, instead, live by and try to hold myself accountable to this quote -- "You are always responsible for how you act, no matter how you feel. Remember that." This year I've learned to be aware of my feelings, my thoughts, my opinions, my words...and while they're all mine and I have every right to have them, that doesn't mean it's always right to share them. Because even things that are "mine," can still harm others.
Lastly, I decided to choose a theme, a word for the year 2013. Resolutions and I don't really get along because often I find that they're surface level and rarely provide the deep change I desire. So this year, after reading this post from Casey, I decided to go with a word. I plan to try to blog about my growth through this theme through out the year. My theme for 2013 is PURSUE.
I want to work on pursuing so many things in my life -- being 100% present for my son, pursuing alone time, date time for Cody and me, pursuing real friendships and real community, and most importantly, pursuing a deeper relationship with my Lord. All of those things, but unfortunately mostly my relationship with God, can tend to falter in the busyness of the every day...this year I want to intentionally PURSUE those relationships because those things far outweigh, and will far outlast this world.
So what about you?
What did you learn this year?
Do you set any goals or resolutions for the new year?
PS: You'll wanna be here tomorrow when I announce a big, month long project for January 2013 that I need YOUR help with. I might have even done a video blog for this post...and it's probably really awkward...oh well.