I can't believe Influence Conference is just days away. I've been trying to get things super prepared around here before I leave for a few days. Cody is perfectly capable but I want everything to be done so he doesn't have to worry about anything besides having fun with G. There's been lots of list making...a what I'm gonna wear each day list, a before I leave to-do list, a packing list, a last minute shopping list...list, list, list. There's been lots of laundry, dishes, baby food making, and just general cleaning.
Obviously, I've been keeping myself busy but behind my productive attitude is pure anxiety. Every worst case scenario about Gunner has run through my mind. Every worst case scenario of my flight has gone through my mind. I'm definitely a worst case scenario person.
And here I am going to a conference where I will be learning to my Influence for Christ and that Satan is putting thoughts of insecurity and doubt in my mind. There I am looking to the lessons I will learn and the women I will connect with, and there's Satan popping his head in reminding me of every weakness I have, everything I've failed at.
This anxiety isn't unfamiliar. I'm typically not great with change or being thrown into unfamiliar situations and I'd hoped that keeping busy would keep that anxiety at bay. No such luck.
I doubt that I'm the only one feeling this way. If you're struggling with worry and anxiety as this conference approaches, know that you aren't the only one. If you're struggling with worry and anxiety in your every day life, know that you aren't the only one.
Today, as a self professed worrier, in the midst of the busyness, the worry, the anxiety I am clinging to these verses...
"Cast your cares on the Lord and he will sustain you;
he will never let the righteous be shaken." -Psalm 55:22
"But blessed is the one who trust in the Lord,
whose confidence is in him" -Jeremiah 17:7
"Cast all your anxiety on him
because he cares for you." -1 Peter 5:7
And this beautiful quote from one of my favorite devotionals. It reminds me that if I'd just let go of the reigns, let go of the worry and focus on HIM that he will bless me in ways I never imagined...
"Lift up your eyes. Your heavenly Father waits to bless you in inconceivable ways to make your life what you never dreamed it would be." -Annie Ortlund
Rest in these verses and these thoughts my worry driven friends. I will be.